I was mistaken, today was the first official day of Cornerstone. went and saw some amazing bands and heard lots of amazing music. This guy, Phil Keaggey (I think) was just amazing. So much skill. There was some amazing violin-rock too. No cool t-shirts this year though.
Got some thinking done; mostly just sad reminiscing, but it needed to be done, I think. Maybe I just say that so I don't feel bad about thinking about it, but whatever. It keeps me in line, puts things in perspective. I just wish there were some things I could fix. And you know what? Maybe I could fix these things, but not without running a huge (and highly possible) risk of just making things worse, because right now these things only affect me. I hope. I struggle for the right words to put down here, and my brain races as I think. It's hard, and I can't adequately describe just how hard without surrendering two things I'm not really ready to surrender yet: some very private emotions, and the lies I've been telling myself. Plus, I don't want to sound like a broken record. I hope I can get to the point where I can put this stuff down, if not say it out loud.
Aw. This seems to happen to you every year around the same time. I hope you're able to reconcile with everything =]
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